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Staying motivated when life throws you curveballs—whether it’s work stress, personal problems, or just the relentless grind—can feel impossible. But it doesn’t have to be. The secret? Keeping your drive alive, even when your willpower feels like it’s on life support. I learned the hard way that motivation isn’t some magical, spontaneous force. You have to cultivate it. And when life gets tough, the right strategies can make all the difference.

Why Motivation Matters More Than You Think

Motivation is that spark that keeps the wheels turning, even when everything feels like it’s falling apart. When you’re facing challenges, it’s easy to become demotivated and want to give up. But the key here? Motivation is a choice, not a feeling. It’s like deciding to eat a salad when all you really want is pizza. You won’t always feel motivated, but you can make yourself act on it. I mean, who among us hasn’t hit the snooze button for the 7th time, right?

Here’s the kicker: Your Motivation Is a Skill

I used to think motivation was either something you had or didn’t. Turns out, that’s a lie. Think of motivation as a muscle. It needs to be worked out, fed, and cared for. And when you’re facing tough times, you want a motivated mind working overtime.

Set Achievable Goals (Even If You Have to Lower the Bar a Little)

We’ve all been there: big dreams, grand ideas, but zero follow-through. I’m talking about the infamous New Year’s resolution. It’s like, “I’m gonna run 5 miles every day”—and you’re lucky if you make it to the mailbox without panting. Goals need to be specific. Realistic. Manageable. Otherwise, your motivation will tank faster than my attempt at learning French via Duolingo (that was a train wreck, by the way).

Here’s the trick: Make Goals So Small That You Can’t Fail

• Be specific: Instead of “get fit,” try “do a 15-minute workout every morning.” That way, it’s not intimidating.
• Break ‘em down: Large tasks are overwhelming. Break them into chunks. Example: Instead of “write a book,” how about “write 500 words today”?
• Track your progress: Keep a little journal. Celebrate when you’ve hit that tiny target. It’s like a pat on the back, but you’re the one giving it.

It’s funny—my first attempt at running a 5k was more of a wog (walk-jog hybrid). But hey, I finished. And I felt like a champion.

Celebrate Small Wins (Seriously, This One Is Huge)

There’s this thing that happens when you face challenges: You start to focus only on what you haven’t achieved yet. I used to do this. I’d forget about the small steps I’d taken, and only focus on the massive leap I still needed to make. Spoiler alert: this doesn’t help.

Why Small Wins Matter

If you don’t celebrate your small victories, you’re basically setting yourself up for burnout. You’ll feel like a hamster on a wheel, running like hell but going nowhere. But when you give yourself credit, you’re saying, “Hey, look at me! I’m doing this!” And that’s the key. Feeling good about progress—any progress—keeps the motivation engine running.

• Reward yourself. Maybe a favorite snack (not too many; we’re not running a junk food marathon here).
• Tell a friend! Get a high-five or a virtual “you got this!” from someone who knows the struggle.
• Reflect on your journey. Sometimes, I even take a moment to look at what I’ve done and say, “Dang, I did that.”

It’s like my first herb garden. RIP, Gary, my basil. But my mint? It thrived like a champ. Every time I snipped a leaf, I felt like a garden goddess. That’s motivation.

Connect with Your “Why” (Seriously, What’s the Big Picture?)

You ever been so tired that you couldn’t remember why you started in the first place? Yeah, me too. Motivation wanes fast when you lose sight of your purpose. You need to stay connected to the why behind your goal. And no, “because I have to” doesn’t cut it. Find your real reason.

My “Why” Story

For me, it was health. I didn’t realize how much I was letting stress and poor habits rule my life until I had a moment of clarity. I asked myself, “Why am I pushing through this?” And that’s when it hit me—staying healthy meant I could be there for my family, my friends, and my future.

• Reflect. Get deep and personal about why you’re doing what you’re doing.
• Write it down, put it somewhere you can see it every day. Heck, I used to scribble mine on my bathroom mirror with a dry-erase marker (it’s a thing, okay?).
• Keep the big picture in mind. When you remember your “why,” it’s easier to stay motivated.

Fun fact: did you know Victorians thought that talking to ferns prevented madness? Don’t knock it—sometimes I talk to my plants. Can’t hurt, right?

Stay Positive (Or Fake It Till You Make It)

Here’s a hard truth: life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. And when you’re in the middle of a tough patch, staying positive feels like an impossible task. But here’s the thing: your mind is a tricky thing. It can either work for you or against you. And when it’s working against you? Motivation falls off a cliff.

Positive Thinking Isn’t Just a Buzzword

A positive mindset isn’t about ignoring the tough stuff. It’s about choosing to focus on solutions. Think of it like this: my neighbor Tina swears her kale patch cured her Zoom fatigue—and she’s not wrong. Positive thinking helps you get out of your own head.

• Practice gratitude daily (I used to do this every morning with a cup of coffee). It’s small, but it helps.
• Surround yourself with people who lift you up. That friend who always knows how to cheer you on? Yeah, keep them around.
• Kick negative thoughts to the curb. Replace “this is too hard” with “I can do this. I’m getting better.”

How to Stay Positive, Even on the Bad Days

I’m not saying you should plaster on a fake smile, but you can train your brain to see the good stuff more often. It’s like trying to find the silver lining when your Wi-Fi goes out—an adventure, not a crisis. And believe me, some days are just harder than others. Just try not to let them win.

Accountability Partners (Yes, You Need One)

Accountability: it sounds so… official, right? Like, who has time for that? Turns out, it’s one of the most effective ways to stay motivated when facing challenges. I didn’t realize how much I needed someone to hold me accountable until I started telling my friend about my goals. Nothing makes you work harder than knowing someone’s expecting results.

Why It Works

• It’s hard to ignore someone asking, “So, how’s that project going?” (Trust me, I tried).
• You’ll feel more responsible if someone is in your corner.
• Having someone else to share the load with makes things easier. Plus, they can offer advice or just listen.

Pro tip: Having a workout buddy is the best. My friend Mike got me to do squats I didn’t know I could do (and yes, I did collapse on the floor afterward).

Self-Care = Motivation Fuel

If you’re constantly running on empty, guess what? You’re not going to have the energy to stay motivated. I’ve been there. Burnout? I knew it well. But motivation thrives when you treat yourself well.

• Sleep is essential. For real. Lack of it? Not good. Your brain needs rest to recharge.
• Exercise. It doesn’t have to be intense—just move. My walks around the block turned into an unexpected way to clear my head.
• Mental health matters. Talk to someone, take a break, or just breathe for a second.

Change It Up (Routine Ruins Motivation, Sometimes)

You know what they say: “Variety is the spice of life.” If you’re stuck in a rut, doing the same thing over and over won’t help. Switch things up to keep your motivation fresh.

• Do something different. Even small changes can make a difference (I once rearranged my entire office because it was a mess and I needed a change of scenery).
• Take breaks. It sounds counterproductive, but trust me, it helps. You’ll come back with more energy and clarity.

Wrap It Up (But Not Too Neatly)

Anyway, staying motivated when facing challenges doesn’t have to be this elusive, unattainable thing. It’s about making small, consistent choices. It’s about remembering why you’re doing it, celebrating every win, and not being afraid to ask for help. If I can get through the chaos of 2020 (shoutout to my sourdough starter RIP), you can definitely do this.